Remember in the movie with Will Ferrell, Stepbrothers, where they clean their bedroom and put in bunk beds? Their famed statement of "now we have room for fun activities." Imagine an empty warehouse with rock climbing walls and lots of room for fun activities. This is climbing. One of my best friends and a rock for me during my time grieving both my dad and Tom is my friend Greg. I met Greg in my last job at the hospital. Greg is an emergency department physician. So, he's actually Dr. Greg. We started at the hospital at about the same time. I don't know if we knew when we first met that we would be lifelong friends, but it just happened. We meshed well together. I remember him and his friend Chris, who worked in our hospital for a short time before leaving for Columbus, Ohio, coming over to meet everyone in the emergency department when they first arrived and getting to know who everyone was and what everyone's respected jobs were. They showed genuine respect for everyone. I am not saying this is an outlier, but it was new to many people working there.
Greg is an inspiration. He is a tremendous person who always smiles, jokes, and is very intelligent. We get on each other about our respective college football rivalries, as he went to Michigan for undergraduate and then went to Toledo for med school. I grew up a huge Ohio State fan. We threw quick verbal jabs at each other for our allegiances. In my dad's time in the hospital, a Michigan-educated doctor was on his team, and my dad's nephew also went to U of M for undergraduate studies. I guess if Michigan is successful with anything, it is educating the future doctors of American medicine.
Greg and I also bonded in this time of need for myself. During this time, he shared with me ways to cope with grief, such as playing lots of video games and taking lots of naps. Our friendship had been strong before this time; we went to a baseball game together, but it was made more potent by this grief cycle. I don't remember exactly how I found myself at the climbing gym with him, but it happened one day. He used a guest pass on me, and we hung out at Iron City Boulders for about an hour and a half, talking and climbing.
Climbing is a fantastic exercise, both mentally and physically. It requires a lot of upper body strength to reach holds and pull your weight to new heights. I never thought this was something I would be into, but I have been climbing with Greg twice, attended a meetup event at a climbing gym, met another friend for climbing, and have gone solo to a climbing gym once. Climbing gyms are very inclusive settings. There are no "lunks" as Planet Fitness refers to the guys who take up all the free weights and judge passersby at LA Fitness. Although there are free weights, they are not overcrowded. The environments are all user-friendly. In Pittsburgh, these gyms started to pop up. I have been to all four but have only climbed at 3.
From the cheapest to the most expensive day passes, FA Climbing in Station Square costs $19, ASCEND in Point Breeze/South Side costs $20, and Iron City Boulders in Lawrenceville costs $21. The smallest to the biggest gyms are ASCEND in Point Breeze, ASCEND in South Side, Iron City Boulders in Lawrenceville, and FA Climbing in Station Square. FA Climbing also validates parking.
(FA Climbing in Station Square)
I hope this friendship continues. I do not see why it wouldn't, but Greg is a fantastic person and friend. I have learned a lot about myself in this period. I have learned about my grief, our shared experiences in grief, how to support a friend who is grieving, and how to take breaks in my grief. In a recently uploaded podcast, I shared how important it is to take breaks in grief. It is essential to know our limits and take the breaks we deserve. I'm helping Tom's wife clean out one of his offices, which is weird for me. Firstly, I never thought I would be doing this at this age. Secondly, I am preparing his files to be shredded; he has many files. Finally, just being in his old office without him is weird. I am working about four to five hours daily emptying filing cabinets. I take a daily break to climb, go to a baseball game, watch YouTube or Netflix, sit outside with Augusta, and read for my mom. There is so much time to grieve, but in grief, we need breaks.
If you read this, Greg, thank you so much for being a part of my life and keeping me strong in this time of need. You are a great person, and I cannot stress that enough.
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